Auden Wolf boosted

"I can't" doesn't always mean "it's literally physically impossible." It can mean, this is too painful, not sustainable, I can do it but it's not worth the price I have to pay. These are all common meanings for "can't" and they apply to us, disabled folks, too.

Auden Wolf boosted

It's a shame adultery means what it means because it sounds way better than "adulting".

Auden Wolf boosted

If you need an excuse to make an excuse, you’re already one layer too deep. Just do things, for “no reason.” The rational mind is for rationalizations, not rationality. I’m not saying if it feels good do it, I’m saying that action can happen. Disimmobilize! You no longer need to wait for permission. No guarantee you’ll get it right, but you will get it going. Start moving and course correct. Make up some fool explanation at the end if you want, but go! Cross the starting line. Spread the word!

Auden Wolf boosted

We feel like making a list of random plural experiences from before we knew we were plural so we're gonna do that. 

No particular order:

* Tiffany Aching books (from Terry Pratchett's Discworld) - the concept of "third thoughts" really resonated with us like and we were like "we want to be like that"

* Having thoughts sometimes coming from different parts of the head - one in particular that only happened when we were stressed and was only kinda mean, stood out as distinct from the others. (turned out to be a walk-in)

* being at least lowkey interested in everything all the time

* rarely engaging in these hobbies and interests - partly due to adhd / executive dysfunction, partly due to being simultaneously interested and disinterested in doing the thing

* Being interested in something for a few hours or a day or two at a time, and then losing it again, and then it coming back.

*Just never quite knowing what sorts of things I was interested in / wanted to pursue because it was everything, but only sometimes.

* Similar with the sort of fashion style / bedroom aesthetic / personality / subculture I wish I had - I wanna be like this, but also like this, and like this, and also like that, and often these were polar opposite and contradicting.

* Similar with kin/therian stuff - feeling like I Am this thing, but only some of the time. Or, for a while, feeling like I was anywhere between 1/4 goblin and 3/4 goblin, but never fully. Turns out goblin-feels was headmate.

* Similar with gender / sexuality - sometimes I seemed to be into guys a but mostly not at all, mostly I was sure I was nonbinary but sometimes felt like I wanted to be a girl or a guy

*Friend of mine's old tumblr bio used to say "Who am I? I'll let you know when I find out" and I always felt like "who am I" is a ridiculous question. You're you, obviously. You're a combination of your experiences and interests and how you process and interpret them, duh. Asking "who" you are isn't a question with any sort of answer.
* (I know who I am now, and I know who the other people are. Turns out some people have a clearer sense of self than I had, huh.)

* Constant vivid fantasy - sometimes this was a depression / adhd / overload / schizoid headmate's thing, but I'm almost entirely certain some of it (and the characters in it) overlapped with headspace and headmates (I know at least two headmates were characters in my daydreams, and at least one was me in those daydreams.

* made a joke to my friend once that I didn't think through, something about "what if the other voices in our heads are actually this other thing?" Idk it just felt fine and then friend was like "what other people in your head?" and I just went "wow I clearly didn't think that one through"

* Encountering on tumblr both blogs with multiple mods who would say "we" and the occasional plural system who would say "we" and at one point, realising that it did feel comfortable to refer to myself as 'we' in my head (only in my head, I didn't want to ""appropriate"" plurality or anything, lol)
* (later, when discovering plurality, I said " 'I' feels curled in, 'we' feels like good posture.")

* The rare occasion there was a post where someone mentioned having headmates / cooperating with headmates (eg. "my therapist is encouraging me to talk to and work with them, because being happy and functional is more important than being ""normal"" ") and I just had this deep feeling of longing / "I wish I could have that"

* Wanting to be or be able to be different people in different places, a la this comic, "Identity Shift" particularly the panel about how inconsistent identities are often viewed as deception or betrayal ("Carly? Why are you dressed like that?):

humans assign all sorts of strange unnecessary meanings to things that are actually quite simple

Auden Wolf boosted

DW crosspost:

An explanation of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), from an ADHDer. Doing an infopost on this, because I've recently had friends say, "I didn't know about this, but when you started talking about it, it sounded like me!"

CWs: stress, panic, suicidal impulses, abuse, along with detailed descriptions of a fear-induced meltdown/shutdown. Some negativity towards certain autistic traits, in the context of my own irrational fears.

Auden Wolf boosted

please boost - trying to find a place for a trans woman to leave her abusive controlling family 

I'm posting this on behalf of a 20 year old closeted trans woman who lives with her family. Her family hates her and is incredibly abusive and controlling. She really needs a place to get out to.

She's in Pennsylvania. If you're around there and can take in a person, or think you might know people who can, please pass it on.

I don't expect anything will come of this, but I'm really hoping that we can make a real difference to one person's life. She needs to get out and she deserves to be happy and to actually be able to live.
Auden Wolf boosted

found a migraine infographic that had a mistyping of fatigue as "fatique" and from this day forth i will only be fatiqued, thank you

it's more fun when things don't fit neatly into boxes that can easily be labeled

Auden Wolf boosted

When are they releasing the DSM6 I need more material to build my character, the old classes and archetypes are getting boring

Auden Wolf boosted

The way mathematics is currently taught it is exceedingly dull. In the calculus book we are currently using on my campus, I found no single problem whose answer I felt the student would care about! The problems in the text have the dignity of solving a crossword puzzle—hard to be sure, but the result is of no significance in life.

— the late, great Dr. Richard Hamming

there's no such thing as a terrible child, only terrible parenting

Auden Wolf boosted

I’ve been thinking a lot about various creative reactions to the absurdity that we all carry supercomputers in our pocket but have to keep upgrading even to retain functionality because software gets worse and surveillance gets more pervasive

Things like low-power computing (Rpi and friends, microcomputers, retro computing, etc), some of the solarpunk stuff, the “smolnet” (Gopher and Gemini and the like), and so on seem to be interesting ways of highlighting that things could be other than they are

Is there an umbrella term for this? Is someone collecting projects that relate to “computing designed to work well even with low-performance/low-power gear”?

it's possible to accept something about a person without understanding it

Auden Wolf boosted

it's said the śākyamuni buddha in a previous life as a bodhisattva killed a person despite having taken the oath of non-violence because he knew they would otherwise go on to murder 500 people. in so doing, he took on the karma of murder, not only to save a greater number of people, but, and this i think is a very interesting point, but to save the person he killed from the karma of mass murder

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just because something is very common doesn't mean it's normal or healthy

Auden Wolf boosted

sending big energy and love to anyone with a strained or non-existent relationship with family of origin over the society sanctioned holiday period 💕

a blog post about trauma and abuse 

I wrote a blog post:

There Is No Such Thing As "Small Trauma", and Abuse is Really Common

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