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Okay, so you find out some furry queer hacker wrote a blog post where they disassembled the original bulb expertly and found out that the inside chips can be used to identity a new bulb. The blog post is distracting with custom emoji reactions throughout the text but it makes sense. They even refer to Nintendo CIC chips having similar handshake ceremonies with the host system for authenticity, and this is how custom game carts could work: a donor CIC chip.

The theory seems fine, and when you try to take apart the bulb, you get a lot of cuts and the shell of the bulb looks like it won't make it.

Frustrated, you find out that you can 3d print a new bulb chip base and with silicone and then a blend of epoxy resin, you can make a heat safe bulb base. Who has it? Someone that posts with anime girl characters everywhere with occasional words consistently misspelled.

After getting a 3d printer, a starter kit of silicone, and the time and patience to follow the anime girl's website, you have a new base. The chip seats in and you put in a common socket part from a hardware store inside. Finally you plug in your generic bulb that looks the same on the outside as the old one and it fits.

You've spent more than it would take to replace the microwave and followed esoteric documentation made by queer people, but at least you stuck up to capitalism or something, right?

Those people are kind of... highly engaged in something, and it kind of inspires you to create with your own tools that you now have.

Two years later, you end up on Hacker news with a my little pony original character as your identity.

All the comments say "I can't read this! There's too many colorful images! It's a waste of bandwidth"

And your article describes how you eventually reverse engineered the firmware of this microwave of all things and removed the light bulb DRM. Honestly a subject that would perfectly match the content of DEF CON. As long as you didn't show any ponies.